JustBhem

Once a upon a time, there was Nai and Tai.  Nai is young, not pretty or ugly, joyful, friendly, bubbly, high spirited girl.  Tai is young too, smart, dedicated, friendly, handsome and tall.  They met during Nai's 1st year in college, and Tai is second year in college. Nai got Tai's attention during ROTC reception when Nai was called by one of the superior.  That's how it was all started.  Tai went to Nai's room to check on her everyday.  Then one night Tai asked Nai to be his girlfriend.  On Nai's Birthday they became lovers instantly.  They we're both happy sharing moments like forever. Tai is very much in love to Nai.  He wrote poems to Nai and tell how he's very delightful of her being his girlfriend.  Trials came into their relationship.  Tai is very sad when Nai broke up with her.  Its not that Nai doesn't love Tai anymore it just that circumstances need them to be apart.  Tai tried every thing to win...

So its one of those another not-so-ordinary day for me, where I can write my sentiments without someone bothering me. Time check is 12:30 AM. Earlier today, we went to church to attend a Sunday mass to praise. Finally! The long wait is over because I convinced him to go to church. I should be happy and bless because of that. Anyway, All I wanted is to write this awful feeling I have in this very moment. So its like this.  I met Ian way back college days or as far as I remember. I already noticed him that night when my ex-best friend introduced me to him. You know that typical guy who you think is shy because he is like that, that because he was stoned that time. He was long haired then, wearing a very tight pants that looks like a gangsters. That's how I described him before. Since then we used to be together, of course with other friends too. I'm so fond of the friendship I have with them. During that time, I have a boyfriend and I don't know much of Ian's personal ...

I'm responsible for my actions. Whatever words I utter I am responsible. I'm not blaming anyone for saying those words. I have all the right and I know I am in the position to get mad. I'm also the victim of this charade which some people are playing like a pro.  Everyone like me deserve to tell the truth and they need to listen. I'm not just other people.  I'm one of them.  Its saddened me after what I heard from someone I always look up to not just when I was a kid, even when I'm this age. I always prayed for his safety. The idea of having a perfect family is washed away by how many tears I shed last night. Its hurting me until now. But I promised myself I wont cry this time. It will not gonna help me moving on.  Its so easy to forgive as for me, but its too hard to forget everything that has been said and done. The lies coming from someone who uses someone to save herself from being judge.  Its really frustrating me that I've trust them long ...

I stayed all day thinking what to write. Since I'm kinda sad so I need to embrace the moment writing the what looks like to be an awful realization that this so called "my past" keeps invading my thought. Yes! He is! By the way, there's no internet connection while writing this piece. So I'm afraid it will not be publish or maybe later.  He sometimes comes in my dreams, like we used to be together.  He invades my troubled thought whenever I feel like crying.  Why? Why is it always comes whenever I feel defeated or alone? Why? when in fact I could not see him in flesh, or hold him next to me.  Its just a sad realization that I'm just messing my mind for all the troubles I have.  I know this ain't right because I have the other one, the future I may call.  Is this normal? Or what?! Oh by the way, the internet connection is back now and I think I will publish this one in a moment.  Is this called cheating? or am I damned again for loving someo...

Bhem You are the apple of my eyes Even if apples were the cause of sin You are the flower that so nice Even if your thorns hurts me within.  You are the sweetest lover And your sweetness caresses my heart You are the perfect kisser And your kisses gives me an art Though the love that we have Is a fault for them But I hope from above It's okay for Him. And if our Love turn to ashes I'll always remember your Love, Hugs and Kisses And though our hearts far from each other I will love you B-H-E-M now and forever.