JustBhem

" The universe is transformation; our life is what our thoughts make it. " Since when was the last time I posted here? Maybe if you will count, it must be ages ago. Anyway, I'm here now. Back to what it is like to write here.  I recall for the past months, I'm becoming more progressive. It must be the experiences that taught me. It really helps a lot.  But lately is odd, I'm becoming oblivion like I tend to forgot things. I wonder why. Is it maybe because I think a lot? Or is over work? Is this a sign that I need to tend to myself and have some hot coffee over in a new place?  Or maybe because I'm tired of searching for that one true love? I kept looking for my own happiness that I even forgot how to smile and wonder to all the beauty around me. Hate is what I become. I really don't like to go back from that awful self where hating is the only feelings I know.  Whatever it is, I just need to deal with it and I know God will provide me all my n...

Dying.Death.Gone.. If I heard someone is dying. I can't help myself asking why someone needs to die?  Why do we need to leave our body?  Where is our soul going?  Then I remember my Mother told me that, people needs to die so that they can have another life somewhere else. Then a whisper coming from my own self saying, do I need to die too?  Who wants to die? I guess nobody wants to die. They want to live. I want to live more. To see the beauty of life and the people I love growing old with me.  Just as I notice myself crying. Then I remember everything, every details on how he died. I hate myself for not being with him when he is about to lose his breath.  How will I ever forget him when all I can think about him is happiness.  Happiness every time we're together.  So many things I need to say to you but I can't say them anymore.  But let me say this to you that you're a friend I can lean on every time I'm sad.  Eve...

Sorry guys! I just got this info from Wikipedia.com just for myself only so that I wont have to look for his information .. so I copied it for myself only.. Vin Diesel (born Mark Sinclair Vincent ; July 18, 1967) is an American actor, writer , director and producer . He became known in the early 2000s, appearing in several successful Hollywood films, including The Fast and the Furious and xXx . He founded the production companies One Race Films , Tigon Studios and Racetrack Records . Early life Vin Diesel was born in New York City , the son of Delora, a psychiatrist and astrologer . [ 1 ] [ 2 ] Diesel has Italian and black ancestry. [ 3 ] [ 4 ] He has described himself as "definitely a person of color" [ 5 ] and stated that he is "of ambiguous ethnicity - Italian and a lot of other stuff". [ 6 ] Diesel has never met his biological father, and was raised by his African-American stepfather, Irving, an acting instructor and theatre manager. [ 1 ] [ 5 ] He ...

Love…. Make us so stupid and at the same time make us happy. Though sometimes it hurts we still willing to try it again and again. They say its unconditional. some say its jealous but for me with the ONE I LOVE, life must go on no matter how jealous I am or how much hurt can give me.. You just have to submit yourself from it. Angel… they’re the one who guide us, when I  was a child I always believed that I have my own angel, whose always there for me, helping me making my home work and look for me when I'm sleeping..I always fascinated with angels since I was a kid that’s why I have my collections of them from different sizes and forms., now that Im old enough, i still believe that I have my angel, not one but many of them, I call them FRIENDS .. Music… makes us feel light and comfortable every time we needed peace of mind. Like me, I'm a one hell of a music lover. I listen to any kind of music as long as it helps me shrink to somewhere I want to be.. I can’t sle...

I was almost lost You. It was like a sand fading to the wind in my hand. Its like my heart is losing its air to breathe. I couldn't dare to see your face. I couldnt dare to speak how sorry I am for what I've been doing lately. On that very moment I want to end myself. I dont even understand myself why I did those. Then afterwards, a warm tear drop comes rushing to my face. I can't see half way through the room. Its blurry and its fading. When You ask me your freedom. I was half dead. I stop breathing. I felt my body is frozen. This time tears wont stop from falling, its like raining on me. I sighed and I said, the reason I ask you for your decision is for me to ask one thing. This time, I'll be the one asking for another chance. Then I just heard myself asking " Do you still love me? " and You said You still do Love me. The same Love You felt 5 years ago, it didnt fade. At least with that thought it makes me feel better. Youll held me hand and said " now ...

Feb 21, 2011 ( Monday ) I was awake, percieved by the light coming from the window. I get up then I feel the vexation. I sleep back thinking that it will cease at least a little. At 11:20 , I woke up again and this time its really annoying and so damn hurt. I feel my head is thumping wild harder. Then I was thinking that this is it. This is the day that I need to see the Doctor. I can't get up because of the dizziness I felt. Its harrowing and I can't even go down stairs to eat. Afternoon, I tried myself to be lull and familiarize the way home to my mother. Then at first I tried to be soothe and poise. A mother really knows there is something wrong with her siblings. My mother asked me, You dont look good, are you okay?. I said you can tell it mom that Im not okay and Im discontent. I was rushed to the near Hospital. As usual, nurses took VS thats what they called it. You know the thing get your Blood pressure and the work. I feel at least homey. My mother who was there and hi...

2010 is not so good to me.. not until I have him in my Life. I thought I may never be able to see life the way it should be. Then he came into my life without notice. Or maybe I already expected it to happen. Some say that he doesn't have the "It" compared to the first one. And I said who cares anyway? does it matter? why not giving him a chance to prove he is worth it to be given a chance to occupy my heart. Others says that he will give me heartaches and pain same as the first one. Then I said, then be it .. only then I can feel that I am human after all. For the past months of enjoying myself with the joy of being with somebody. I found my self stuck and I feel like theres no way for me to get Him out of my Life. Well, I can say maybe just for now.. teehee .. I dont know, we never can tell, right? I mean, theres no period for this. As long as Im enjoying the fun of being with Him, hurting of being so sensitive and impatient. I can say that this is the o...