Skip to main content

Of Being into Dialysis

I really dont like sharing. And since I have a blog I'm much oblige to share. Okay. I'm 32 years old and I'm sexy. Kidding.

I worked in a callcenter for five years. Not to mention the months I went on for call center hopping way back 2008 in Manila. Went home in Davao for a break from the hussle and buzzle of the city life and the painful of heartbreaks. Started a new life in this old place. Worked my way as independent citizen of Davao. Succeeded for 5 years as a callcenter agent.

Year 2009 I was diagnosed of having a cyst in my right ovary and I need to remove it, of course I need to have an operation to get it done. Since then I experienced throbbing sensation of mild headache, painful nape and unwanted vomiting. They said, that once your body is open to any kind of operation, expected you'll get any kind of sickness. So, at age of 25 I was diagnosed of a Chronic Kidney Disease secondary to Hypertension. Since then I tasted the awful bitterness of taking my maintenance.

2013, I felt the need to take a break from work. Because for five years I've been in and out of the Hospital. Maybe because of too much stress and with that I get a lot of absences. Then I decided to end my contract.

 It was awesome to have the freedom of not stressing your day to work. Not stressing yourself to hit the given target at work. Not stressing yourself to wake up in the morning not to be late. I have all the freedom in my world.

And just when I thought I have all the freedom, then came one of the worst nightmare. October of 2013, I was diagnosed of having an End Stage Renal Disease and it requires me to undergo Hemo-Dialysis.

My whole being was shattered. Thinking about myself  for a lifetime Dialysis. Questions flooded me. Like where can we get the money? Am I going to survive it? Am going to die, soon?  I am so afraid. And since I dont have any idea about how it will work for me. We sorted for blood transfusion instead. Hoping I will get better.  We thought it will be a big help but sad to say, it will only make me feel worst.

December of 2013, we decided to commit into the treatment of Hemo-Dialysis. And guess what, until now I'm still into treatment. So, every Monday and Thursday is my weekly schedule. It's kinda tiring at first but I get used to it already.

Dialysis, for others are scary because it means that there's no getting back. It scary for others because they thought you will die. But its not. It will make you a little bit better and live. But you have to commit yourself for the treatment. You have to embrace the fact that that's the only way for you to live. And the idea that you need to be strong and be an inspiration for someone who is going to that phase.

I know its hard and its painful but that's how it works. Been into Dialysis for 2 years and I still hope that there's still a miracle coming for us who believe we can be okay. For those people, who sadly didn't make it. May you have a wonderful journey somewhere.

If you know someone who are into Dialysis like us. Don't judge. Instead understand us. Because you dont know we are fighting our battle everyday. To live our life to the fullest.




Wicked Sick.. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

One words Day

I'm so inspired to write some poetry today. It's like words come right through me. But I'm not a good writer just like anybody. I'm just trying to be like one and will never stop writing as long as I live. Learning the basic is what I'm doing now. Inspired by those local and individual who loves to write. I have here two of my writings. I know its not constructed but that's poetry right? More misery in its words. I also discovered my new fave author though I haven't got a chance to read her book but read some of her passage and poems. And I'm looking forward to have her books. Anyway, here's my two piece of my written words. More writings from me.. Till then. 

Look who's back with a BANG!

And I'm back here.  The last time I fueled this page was last year.  What's new? Same thing the usual.  I'm still the sick me.  How I wish I can tell myself, hey' I'm back from the normal person I am. The happy outgoing me.  Actually, there is something new about me.  I'm no longer the person who likes to go outside, instead, I'm becoming a cavewoman.  The only place where I'm comfortable walking around in the center where I have my treatment. Since I was confined last April and June, my body became proportional, my face is kind of bloated and I'm having a hard time standing straight and even walking straight. I know that these are the changes you have once your body is no longer having the mutual understanding of all the components needed in your body. This year, my calcium was less, phosphorous is still high - when can I get this lower. I did a test for my iPTh and I've got 500 plus which is not as bad as they said but my body is gettin...

Reasons to Live more by Bhem

I really love being alive. I can eat my favorite icecream,watching fireworks,raising your hands on rollercoaster,getting good grades you work hard for,childhood memories,going on a long walks,singing your heart out,dancing forhours,climb the highest peak,walking barefoot in the sand,your first jump in pool in the summer,shopping and buying your new clothes,facebook creeping,waking up in the morning,being texted first,listening to a meaningful song or lyrics,go on for a family trips,long summer nights,listening to the sound of the rain,wearing my chuck shoes in the office,loving the color red,green and yellow,swimming,wonderful world,whispering,hugging the one you love,having a long walks with him,wanderlust,when you know someone likes you too,that one person you can talk to about everything,sleeping for more than 10 hours,knowing the 7 new wonders of nature,seeing a new life born,watching the 80's movies,wearing bracelets and anklets,being inked,piercings,fishtail braids,dreaming o...