Growing up without a mom to guide you is somewhat awful. I was 16 when my mom decided I need to live with my grandmother (my father's aunt) so that I will have a better future ahead of me since she no longer take the responsibility. I have no choice because I am a good daughter.
I hate not to be with my siblings because I know they need me instead of my mom. But what can I do? I am once an obeying daughter.
Living in my grandmother is not quiet hard. My only task was to cooked breakfast for lola. Help her take her medicine and looked after her sugar intake.
She also was the one who make my way to college. She took full responsibility for my studies. Gave me clothes to wear and a shelter. Though sometimes we don't talk much I know she cares for me and I loved her for that.
When I found out my mom was dating someone. I pictured out our family. I felt that I shouldn't be here and that I should be with my brothers who needs me. I blamed myself for being a good daughter who live under what my mother has to say.
Years passed.
Now, I become bad. I no longer have the traces of being good because it only give me weaknesses and sadness. Being bad makes me stronger. But not being bad as evil. Bad because I'm stubborn and I curse a lot. I talked bad words to my mom. I blamed her for what's going on with me and to my brothers. I blamed her for being so selfish. I hate to say it but that's what she was.
I hate because she was the one who taught me to hate. I never felt she cares a lot for me. Not even now that I'm dying. She only cares about herself. She always say this. She's done sacrificing. Where? I didn't see it.
I love my brothers so much that it hurts seeing them like this. No education. Worked at a young age. Having a family at an early age. If only I can bring back the time. I will go back to the time I was 16..
Wicked Sick
I hate not to be with my siblings because I know they need me instead of my mom. But what can I do? I am once an obeying daughter.
Living in my grandmother is not quiet hard. My only task was to cooked breakfast for lola. Help her take her medicine and looked after her sugar intake.
She also was the one who make my way to college. She took full responsibility for my studies. Gave me clothes to wear and a shelter. Though sometimes we don't talk much I know she cares for me and I loved her for that.
When I found out my mom was dating someone. I pictured out our family. I felt that I shouldn't be here and that I should be with my brothers who needs me. I blamed myself for being a good daughter who live under what my mother has to say.
Years passed.
Now, I become bad. I no longer have the traces of being good because it only give me weaknesses and sadness. Being bad makes me stronger. But not being bad as evil. Bad because I'm stubborn and I curse a lot. I talked bad words to my mom. I blamed her for what's going on with me and to my brothers. I blamed her for being so selfish. I hate to say it but that's what she was.
I hate because she was the one who taught me to hate. I never felt she cares a lot for me. Not even now that I'm dying. She only cares about herself. She always say this. She's done sacrificing. Where? I didn't see it.
I love my brothers so much that it hurts seeing them like this. No education. Worked at a young age. Having a family at an early age. If only I can bring back the time. I will go back to the time I was 16..
Wicked Sick
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