Blast from the Past..

2007 has been by far the worst and tragic year for me. I did pick up some learning along the way though. I learned that how much someone had love you they can still hurt you, cut the very soul of you and what distressing the most is, hated you for no unclouded reasons.

It was too long for me to fully recover and realized that you have to +Love yourself more. I'm just to naive of the feeling of loving someone. Dreamed of such a Fairy tale kind of story. But I'm no Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty for that matter. The idea of loving myself more and that I need to be strong etched forever.

I lure myself of pleasing every one to like me, to get along with them is the most annoying part for me. But that Idea washed away because I know damn well my limitations. I'm still into healing process. The scars are still fresh. Entertaining what they call Love is bootless for me. And I'm always guarded with boundaries.

I gained more friends without asking them for sympathy. I gained love and respect from my +Family which is my sole inspiration to moved on and lived my life to the fullest. They did not ask me instead understand my silence and rejection to talk things out. Getting reunited with that vivacious feeling is so overwhelming. After all I'm still blessed. I can wear my pretty smile again, laugh out loud. I am back to being me. I know my journey is yet to come. I can feel my heart utterly pounding for joy. Scars are still hurting though but not too much anymore. Those scars are part of me, a lesson best learned from the Past..

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Look who's back with a BANG!

And I'm back here. The last time I fueled this page was last year. What's new? Same thing the usual. I'm still the sick me. How I wish I can tell myself, hey' I'm back from the normal person I am. The happy outgoing me. Actually, there is something new about me. I'm no longer the person who likes to go outside, instead, I'm becoming a cavewoman. The only place where I'm comfortable walking around in the center where I have my treatment. Since I was confined last April and June, my body became proportional, my face is kind of bloated and I'm having a hard time standing straight and even walking straight. I know that these are the changes you have once your body is no longer having the mutual understanding of all the components needed in your body. This year, my calcium was less, phosphorous is still high - when can I get this lower. I did a test for my iPTh and I've got 500 plus which is not as bad as they said but my body is gettin...

Korean Historic Drama : Empress Ki..

For five days of not having a connection from internet, I went on buying the full episode of korean's historic drama 'Empress Ki'. I watched it for 4 days in a row and mom was furious checking our electricity bill. Anyway, the story gyrated when a simple girl from Koryo become the Empress of the Yuan Dynasty, and before she achieve the throne, she needs to by pass those people who battle her to reign the throne. It was a 51 episode and every episode consumed an hour, so imagine my mom's furious eyes. This is the first time I took a chance to watch a korean historic drama. I really don't like history, especially the dress and how they dress. When father bear asked me to buy the full episode and watched it, I got hooked up and never want to end the story. And to my surprised. I finished watching it. These are the characters from the Korean's Historic Drama 'Empress Ki'. Empress Ki or Sung Nyang Ki. Played by Ha Ji Won. Togon Temur, the...

One words Day

I'm so inspired to write some poetry today. It's like words come right through me. But I'm not a good writer just like anybody. I'm just trying to be like one and will never stop writing as long as I live. Learning the basic is what I'm doing now. Inspired by those local and individual who loves to write. I have here two of my writings. I know its not constructed but that's poetry right? More misery in its words. I also discovered my new fave author though I haven't got a chance to read her book but read some of her passage and poems. And I'm looking forward to have her books. Anyway, here's my two piece of my written words. More writings from me.. Till then.

JustBhem

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